If you think certain women have all the luck in the world because of their good looks, think again. Dating divas, no matter how they look, can charm any men because they know the secrets to attract men. Want to know how they do it? Read the useful methods below and know the secrets to attract men, so you can mesmerize them into falling for you.
Love your beauty. Acknowledge that you are beautiful. You may not look like the models in fashion magazines or TV commercials, but rest assured that those models would not actually look like that without makeup and a lot of work. And though men may fancy the idea of dating a supermodel, real, touchable beauty is a hit with them anytime.
So in style, emphasize your assets and hide your flaws. Or, you can work on your flaws but don’t get so fixated on them that you forget that you are already beautiful. Remember, beauty is also an attitude. Women who believe they are beautiful are attractive to men.
Be in the know, but not a know-it-all. Don’t be afraid to show your intelligence. Mature, confident men like smart women. If he’s threatened by your intelligence, then you have to ask yourself if you really want to go out with a man like him.
Be careful, though, that you don’t come across as a know-it-all. A witty remark or a brief comment about current events here and there is fine; but talking this way for the entire or almost the entire conversation is in bad taste. Acting this way won’t draw men in at all.
Be fascinated. When you get the chance to talk to a guy you like, show your fascination. Ask him questions. Listen to him talk. Acknowledge and show that you’re interested in what he’s saying. Subtly mirror his tone of voice and body language. A fascinated woman fascinates a man. This is one of the best-kept secrets to attract men.
Be careful, though, not to appear overeager. And make sure that the conversation is not only about him. Let him know something about you as well to pique his interest.
Touch. Touch him subtly and naturally – on the shoulder, arm, etc. A single touch can kindle sparks. A light, “unconscious’ touch on the man’s knee is particularly sensual and can stir his imagination.
Keep an air of mystery. While you may share things about yourself, don’t tell all or don’t tell too much. Leave some of your statements open-ended and let him wonder. Make him eager to learn more about you. Men are always pulled in by a little mystery.
With these secrets to attract men, you will find that attracting men is not as hard as you may think.
Tuesday, 21 August 2007
Secrets to Attract Men – Great Attraction Techniques to Spellbind Men
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12:25
Online Dating And You
In today's world, it can be hard to find the time to date. Harder still, to find that one person who you really want to be with. The constant pressure of work, and the rush of high-speed living, means that any time you have not carefully scheduled can quickly be swallowed up. This makes it increasingly vital for you to insure that you have time for yourself.
As busy as you are, it's probably pretty rare that you get the chance to stop and chat with your friends, much less with someone completely new. Meeting can be hard even if you have the time, and it's more important then ever nowadays that you find a way to meet people beyond your circle of friends or co-workers.
But don't worry, there is a way. You can simply go online. Online dating is not new, but has only recently come into its own, and is now one of the most popular methods of meeting new people. All you have to do is create a profile, and then let the online service find your perfect match. This all sounds pretty easy, and it usually is, but of course no relationship is without its share of bumps.
Enter Anita. A professional relationship consultant, she has years of real-life experience as well as a degree in psychology and a great deal of expertise on all forms of relationships. She now works as a columnist for dateswho.com, a site providing in depth advice on online dating.
In her evenings, Anita works as a matchmaker with one of the most successful matchmaking services in her city, and up until just recently she was also a profile editor at an online dating company. Now, she happily gives advice on dating to anyone who needs it, drawing both on her years of study and her own, personal, experience.
And she really does have the experience. Having been through three turbulent common-law relationships as well as two failed marriages, she really does know what she's talking about. If you need advice on any aspect of dating, then just head down to dateswho.com and send her a question. Her advice is always spot on, and very helpful.
After deciding to go for online dating, you need to track down a dating site. There are plenty of sites available, either for free or with a membership cost, and it won't take you long to track them down with google. You may have to look through a few, of course, to find the one you want.
If you have any trouble deciding between them all, then the best plan is just to sign up for as many as you can. If finding a partner is really important to you, this is obviously the way to go, as you can be sure that at least one of those will be right for you. Just spend some time browsing through them all, and then pick the one that looks right.
If you are really having a hard time choosing, or even if you just need general advice about dating online, there are plenty of places you can look for that as well. For starters, of course, there's dateswho.com, but if you go to google you'll easily find a multitude of others. There are plenty of places to pick up quick tips, and even find some helpful reviews of dating sites.
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12:24
How to draw genuine love to you using the Law of Attraction
The Law of Attraction is one of the most powerful laws in the universe. According to it like attracts like. That is why creatures of the same kind attract each other. Wherever there is one ant, you will find many more; wherever there is one farmer you will find several farmers; wherever there is a lone sheep or cow you will find a herd. We all know that wolves hunt in groups; and fish swim in packs. But have we tried to find out why?
We never analyze how we make friends or companions. But if we do we will find that our friends are like us in most ways. They share the same values, the same lifestyles, the same ideas, and the same goals. This is what the Law of Attraction does; it brings all those things together that are alike.
True love
Most successful marriages are those where the man and woman are alike. The marriages where men and women have different tastes, different likes and different interests don't last long. They fall apart. The apparent reasons for these marriages falling apart may be stress, workplace pressure or extra-marital affairs, but the base reason is always the same. The union in the first place was of two people who were not alike. They came together against the Law of Attraction. That is why they could not stay together even though they were bound by vows of holy matrimony.
In contrast, two individuals who are alike continue to live together as man and woman under the same roof even if they are not married. The society may frown on such relationships but it cannot force such couples to part ways. They have been brought together by the Law of Attraction. Theirs is not a relationship of convenience; theirs is a relationship based on shared values, shared likes and shared goals. This is what true love is. It is the joining of two hearts, two minds and two bodies that are alike.
How to draw true love
True love takes shape without our knowledge. In fact, have we ever stopped and wondered why we are attracted to a particular girl or a particular boy? There may be ten girls in a class of 25. How is it that we are attracted to one girl alone? How is it that we continue to come closer to that girl only, and not to other girls who may be equally pretty?
The first reaction of any such couple is that they are alike. Great. But how did they find each other? They were lucky; of course. They happened to be in the same class, is what they will tell you. But what about millions of other couples? Some met on a road, some in a train, some at a local dance, some in the church. But all bonded together. How?
This is where true love comes in. You don't have to find true love; it finds you. You only have to recognize it. On first reading, it may sound bizarre. But the reality is that our thoughts are not limited to our mind. They are like waves of energy that keep radiating from our minds. When this energy collides with similar energy radiating from another mind, true love springs up. This is what we call a meeting of minds.
Love and lust
It is also love at first sight. However, for this love to blossom and bloom it has to go past physical lust. Often, the physical desire blocks the thoughts that our minds are radiating. We are so obsessed with each other that our minds refuse to tune in to each other's thoughts. Such relationships, even when they get converted into marriage, are unlikely to last long.
That is why dating is so useful. It gives couples sufficient time to listen to each other's unspoken thoughts. Their minds either continue to come closer or move apart. That is why we say that at times young couples have a mind of their own. They may be heartbroken if such relationships break. But their grief would only be temporary. The heartbreak would be much worse if the couples don't listen to their inner mind, and hope that they can change their partners once they get married. It will never happen..
Healthy relationships
The Law of Attraction is not limited to the world of love alone. It operates in the professional and the social world too. It is this law that brings two individuals together to forge a successful business partnership. It is also this law that brings two thieves or two crooks together - because their minds radiate the same thoughts.
Everything would be so simple if this law worked properly. Individuals who shared the same likes would live together; individuals who shared different viewpoints would live in their own world. But this does not happen. How often do we read in newspapers of a good man destroyed by a trusted colleague? How often we share tales of a rich man lured by a shark?
This happens when we switch off our mental antennas or when we close our minds to negative thoughts. We get blinded by our desires. There is no meeting of minds but a meeting of interests. When this happens we are bound to lose. This is where good men go astray.
That is why it is important to build social or professional relationships with an open mind. If you get a feeling that everything is not right about a person you have met, you must respect that feeling. Don't allow monetary interests to overpower your feelings. Avoid that individual before it is too late.
This will allow you to build relationships that are in your interest, relationships that you will cherish - not regret.
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12:13
How can women break the insidious cycle of relationship failure
Nothing is more traumatic than seeing a relationship falling apart. It breeds suspicion, distrust and distance. A couple who could not live without each other at one point of time start finding reasons to stay away. The relationship failure is painful for both the partners. Both try to hurt each other; and the more they hurt each other the more they destroy what was once a very loving relationship.
Signs of relationship failure
It needs no special skills to understand when a relationship starts turning sour. Some of the indicators are:
1. The partners start finding fault with each other.
2. They stop listening to each other
3. They start spending more time outside the house
4. They find less and less time, and even less reason, to touch each other or reassure each other that everything is right.
5. The trust breaks down.
6. No satisfactory explanations are offered for coming late.
7. Phone calls are not returned
8. There is an attempt to hurt and wound each at the slightest possibility.
9. The mutual respect that existed for each other starts shrinking.
10. There are high expectations but no give and take.
How can women save the relationship
The onus to save a relationship rests on both the partners. One partner alone cannot save a relationship if the other is adamant of walking away. However, if the relationship is in trouble on account of misunderstandings then surely the woman in the house can save it.
The first step is to start listening to her mate. She need not flare up or show her disapproval if she does not agree to what he has to say. Instead, she must accept at face value his statements. This is not an easy task but the first critical step to assuage his male ego. No man wants to be treated lightly. He will start feeling more wanted if he finds that the woman he loves is not always on the warpath. The small conversations that ended up in bitterness and conflict will gradually start getting longer.
The next step is to show that you want your man to come closer to you. This can start by putting a little more passion in the peck that you give him when he leaves for work or the hug when he returns. He may surely be surprised, and even a little restrained to return you new found love, but there is no better way to close the gap than through touch. It can bridge the widest of distances that may divide a relationship.
You should simultaneously start finding fault with him. Don't ask him to give an explanation for coming late or staying away on weekends. Take it in your stride. Wait for him to open up.
Give the man some space
Also, give him space to unwind when he returns from work. You don't have to rush to him, and start a conversation. Every man likes some private time and space to himself. Let him avail it; let him cool down and become emotionally more ready for your light chat and banter. Avoid subjects that he thinks are frivolous; focus on issues that may interest him. Of course, don't try to fool him by trying to over reach yourself. Even silences are great for companionship. You can just pat his hair or hold his hand while he watches TV or hover close around him to make him feel wanted.
Soft music and good food can make him more relaxed. Try to play music that he likes, and cook food that he loves. You should allow him to set the pace if he wants to take you to bed. Don't push yourself on him. But let him believe that you have come to him because you wanted it. This anyway is true.
Don't try to change your man
It is important that you stop trying to change your mate. This is one mistake that most spouses make. They think that their men will change if they keep after them. Nothing can be more counterproductive. Constant nagging only leads to revolt and rebellion. Also, stop blaming your mate for anything and everything that has gone wrong in the relationship. It will only make him fight back.
You must not sound or look dishonest when you are trying to salvage the relationship. It is essential that you have full belief in what you are doing. You should gradually make him talk of why he had starting moving away from you. Once again, you don't have to push him into talking about his misgivings. You should create a situation where he wants to confess, where he wants to release the pent up feelings. This can have magical affect on your relationship. Suddenly, the ghosts that had bedeviled your relationship will be exorcised.
There will be trust again, and mutual faith. Try not to loose it again.
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12:13
What to do with a man who has commitment phobia
There are some men who make women feel very lovable and desirable. They lavish love and gifts on them, and make them feel very special. But when it comes to marriage, they back out. They have a great fear of getting tied to a single woman for life. They run away from the very idea of marriage. Their relationships never have fairytale endings; instead they are littered with heartbreaks.
These men suffer from commitment phobia, a fear of committing themselves to one single woman. However, they don't hesitate to play the loving game. They go out of their way to make their women feel special. They woo them with all the passion that they can command. But they cool off once the woman talks of marriage.
How to spot a commitment phobe
For any woman it is important to spot commitment phobes - that is men who suffer from commitment phobia -- early in the relationship. This is the only way they can keep their feet firmly on the ground, and not get swept away by the charm offensive launched by such men.
Fortunately, the commitment phobes are very predictable and display several common traits. These are:
1. They have been involved in several relationships in the past, but all of them have been brief. The reason, they will charmingly tell you, is that they are yet to come across a woman of their dreams, someone with whom they can have a lifelong relationship. You are that woman, they will tell you. It is for you to spot the lie or swallow it hook, line and sinker.
2. They would show much more interest in you that you do in them They will follow you, beseech you, please you, woo you - try every trick in the trade to win you over.
They will even drop hints of long and stable relationships; they will talk of "we" and "us" not "I" and "me".
3. They will make you feel very special. They will shower you with love and affection. They will make you feel their world will come to an end if you spurn them or misunderstand them. You will find it impossible to resist them, unless you realize what is happening.
However, this ardent wooing will be limited to the first phase of the relationship. The relationship will take a different turn the moment you surrender It is not that such men treat women as trophies to be won, and then displayed in their personal museums; but they are driven by contradictory feelings. They neither want to give up a woman nor want to commit themselves to her. It is a psychological disorder. But it can have serious effects both on the relationship, and on you.
You will not realize what has happened to your relationship. The same man, who could not live without you for a moment, will start looking for excuses to stay away from you. You will no longer be the shining light of their lives. The talk of matrimony will freeze them. Your tears may make them unhappy but it will not move them. It wouldn't be long before you are left only with memories and tears; the commitment phobe would have moved forward to another woman.
Why do they behave like this
You need not search for reasons for the souring of the relationship. You should also not blame yourself for what has happened. You must realize that commitment phobia is an emotional disorder, and you have become a victim of a person suffering from such a disorder.
According to psychologists, the commitment phobes behave like this because they suffer from certain beliefs about relationships. This may happen because:
1. As a sensitive child, a commitment phobe's world was torn by a bitter divorce between his parents. He grew up with a feeling that there can be no permanent relationship between a man and a woman. Such a relationship can only bring pain in the long run.
2. Some commitment phobes cannot reconcile to the death of their father or mother or forget the sadness and grief that overcame their parents when one of them died. They therefore grow up with the feeling of not to enter into permanent relationships - relationships that can bring pain on account of the death of a loved one.
3. Some commitment phobes may have been betrayed by those whom they loved. This would have created a mindset of never to give in to a woman again.
How to deal with a commitment phobe
You must realize that you have very few chances of winning a commitment phobe. You must therefore play hard to get. You must refuse to get into bed with him for very often this signals the end of a relationship. Let him feel desperate; let him step up his wooing. But don't give in.
It is important that you continue to live your own life. You should not allow a commitment phobe to set the pace of your life. You should continue dating other men and act as an independent woman who can live her life on her own. Never make the mistake of playing second fiddle to such men or switching to what-a-wife-would-do mode.
You should not drum excuses for his behavior, or try to convince yourself that he is right and you are wrong. In your mind, you should not become his advocate. You must look at his actions, not his words. Words are easy; they can be lavished with freedom. But it is hard to match them with action.
If possible, you should convince him to see a psychologist. There is always a chance that a psychologist may be able to remove the fears that a commitment phobe has about marital relationships. But this cannot happen in an instant. You have to be patient, aand you have to see how the commitment phobe takes your suggestion or the counseling.
Finally, don't grieve if your relationship breaks down. Take it in your stride. Treat it as a fun fling that was bound to end this way.
at
12:12
How to Tell if You Have Chemistry With The Love of Your Life
When you're attracted to someone, you might realize it right from the start. They make you feel special or they make your face curl into a smile each time they're around. You can't explain it, but you can feel it right into your toes. But are these feelings enough to tell if you have the right chemistry or not? Here's what you should be looking for:
How do you feel when they are around?
Whenever you are around a certain person, take a personal inventory of how you feel. Are you happy or are you less than happy? Try to figure out how you are feeling each time they walk into the room. Are you excited to see them and feel anxious to talk to them and be in their presence? The more positive you feel about the way this person makes you feel, the more chemistry you will have.
How do you feel when they are not around?
You don't want to feel like you can't go on, but do you feel like something is missing when the person in question is not around? Do you somehow feel like you're not having as much fun as you could if they were? When the person isn't around, you should be feeling a little less than happy. You might feel like you want them to be around you right then and that everything would be better if they were with you.
How do they feel when you're around?
This is a trickier thing to measure as you can never really tell what someone is feeling unless you ask them. But there are subtle clues a person may be giving off that can show you whether they enjoy your company or not.
· Open body language - If they are trying to face you to talk to you, keeping their arms uncrossed and not crossing any other part of their body, it shows that they want to remain open to you and to whatever you are saying. This is a good sign that they are attracted to you.
· Eye contact - While the other person shouldn't be leering at you, making direct eye contact when they are speaking to you and when they are listening to you is a great way to tell if you have chemistry or not.
· Increased pupil dilation - This is a little harder to tell, but if you're making eye contact with them, you will see that this happens. The black part of the eye will become bigger when a person is excited to talk to someone that the like. It might not be tremendously different, but it will certainly change in size.
· A relaxed expression - Not everyone will grin from ear to ear when they talk to someone they like, but they should seem relaxed and calm when they are around you. Their face should not be stiff or strained. When you see crinkles around the eyes, this is a sign that the person is relaxed as they look at you.
What are they saying to you?
Chemistry can also be seen in the way that someone talks to you. People that are positive about their lives when they talk are generally feeling positive about the person with whom they are speaking. Subliminally, they are trying to show that they are a good person, so they are only showcasing the good in their lives.
Other things that you can look for include:
· A tendency to make plans - When you're talking to someone and they're already making plans for the two of you to see each other more or do something exciting down the road, this is a sign that they want to spend more time with you.
· Attempts at humor - Not everyone is as funny as a comedian, but when someone tries to be humorous with you, it's a sign that they want to make you happy and that they really want to please you. Of course, being fake in trying to be funny can go over badly.
· A touch when they are talking - No matter what they are saying, if someone tries to touch you when they are talking with you - and it doesn't have to be anything more than a quick touch - it is a sign of good chemistry between you, especially when you don't turn away from the touch.
Good chemistry is hard to find, but when you find it, you'll know.
at
11:57